Cameron Diaz agrees to age gracefully

Following the release of her latest book, The Longevity Book,  film actress, director, producer, stunt woman and passionate anthropologist Cameron Diaz has finally agreed to grow old with her dignity intact.

There’ll be no more of this.

Following a relentless and public back and forth with the mighty overlords of the entertainment industry, Diaz has backed down on the grounds that she is allowed to continue harvesting the pubic hair of women across the world. This comes after she urged women to keep their pubic hair in her debut lifestyle bible The Body Book – although it was unclear whether she meant they should keep it in their copy or in her original copy. Probably in their own copy because there’d be too much hair to put in one book.

Having agreed to these terms, Diaz will now be forced to refrain from dancing around in her pants and may even be asked to wear deodorant. For years, she’s been avoiding it and dodging fines along the way, claiming that it ‘keeps the stink in’. Finally, it seems, the powers that be have caught up with her – and explained that that’s exactly what deodorant is there to do.

Bonnie Pumphouse

Bonnie began her professional life selling caravan kitchens. She then took on a part-time role throwing lady parties for a well-known sex toy retailer, but they parted ways over artistic differences. She now splits her time between a much higher end sex toy retailer and writing exciting, inspirational articles for Glamourless – all aimed at REAL women like her.

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